Often making it harder on myself by being consumed by my circumstances – whether that was a living situation or insecurities I was feeling over that situation instead of accepting and understanding that they were all temporary situations and would eventually change. I relate to this because throughout my childhood and early 20s, I wanted to change things I had no control over. “ “My Life in the Sunshine,” that record made me feel something … I could have something … I couldn’t get my hands on it but it was something I wanted,” Blige says in the film.

I can relate when she reflects on her personal connection to the 1976 Roy Ayers ubiquity hit “Everybody Loves The Sunshine.” Music was her coping mechanism to escape the realities of her childhood – just like it was mine. Watching the film, I see myself in her pain, trauma and the whirlwind to find her footing in her career. Music was (Mary’s) coping mechanism to escape the realities of her childhood – just like it was mine. The title track, “My Life,” holds a special connection to where I am now in my own life. Especially knowing she was reflecting on her life at just 23. Our shared favourites off the album were “Be Happy” and “You Bring Me Joy,” but now that I’m grown, the lyrics to the entire project hit harder. In the recently released Amazon original documentary, “My Life,”the songstress takes us back to 1994, to share the behind the scenes of the making of her second album, also titled “My Life.” Although I was born the year after this album came out, I was introduced to it through my father, who was a DJ when I was growing up.

The most recent example I’ve seen of a self-love journey that mirrors mine, is from actress, singer and businesswoman, Mary J. Choosing myself, not carrying guilt and letting myself learn how to just put one foot in front of the other are some of the ways I have to re-parent my younger self now. One thing I’ve learned now is that my younger self needed is to quiet the noise and go inward. I’ve had to break down, then re-build, brick by brick to understand myself and create a sense of identity that doesn’t seek approval, validation or shrink myself to appease others (despite being outspoken in certain areas of my life).īecoming self-aware is also hard work, it doesn’t stop and there’s no right way to do it. My own journey with self-love has been much grittier and more turbulent than expected and a far cry from glamourous. We read about it in books, watch it play out on-screen and listen for guidance about it on podcasts, but learning to love yourself isn’t for the weak.

Many people avoid their own mirrors and don’t look until someone, or a particular circumstance, gives them no other choice but to do so. Healing is no easy task, it’s hard work to continuously commit to taking a look in the mirror to build awareness of the things, aspects and traits that you may or may not like about yourself.

Mary j blige my life in the sunshine